Oouch! it hurts!

Went skating this evening. Ice skating. First time doin it, so I was rather excited, and a bit nervous; I've problem with balancing. =p

Lesson 1 report:

I can walk with the skates on the ice, without support. heh.
I can glide a lil too.
I did like 7 rounds on my own.
I fell on my bum twice. And it hurts man I tell you. I can still feel the pain now. T_T
I've probably burnt more calories today than any other days.

This Comes a Lil Unexpected

I thought AZ is not goin to bother with my asking for feedbacks, but they have jus surprised me today. On one hand, I am like, glad, that they really do what they claimed, on the other hand, I'm feeling a bit, hesitant; can I handle the truth?

Driving

Bus crashed, again, 3 deaths.

It gives me a cringe reading the news for Konsortium was one of the bus company I took back then from Singapore back to KL, if not with Aeroline. If all rules and regulations imposed do not seem to effect, we can only watch out for ourselves. This bus crashing issue due to the recklessness and irresponsibility of the driver is not a new issue, it is never a new issue for that matter, but why is it still repeating itself? It's jus saddening, yet it seems to be the way to go these days.

Now that I no longer need to travel, I'm worried for my sister. She better stick with Aeroline which has a better credibility, especially CNY is around the corner.

Driving is never a one person's biz. Don't they jus fucking get it?

I Don't Know What Title This Should Be

The melody, the scent and the warmth still linger around the room.

I've got the lyrics translated, so bloody darn good it brings me back to those days.

Don't ask me 'are you happy', I'm not good at lying. That moment.

I've been mind-travelling back and forward of late.

The sorrow has lost its freshness.

So, what exactly do I want to say.

I've no idea but I know I need to have the crystals stuff ready, in me.

Fire Alarm Episode

The fire alarm went off. And it went off at a very brilliant hour - 6 in the morning where everyone was still in their deep slumber! Me certainly. Was made a bit hostile to be awaken by stupid bangings on the door which I thought I could ignore, but its persistency got me raised my white PJs, I mean, white flag.

Nobody was smiling, as far as I could see. Duh, who would at this freaking hours this weather? It's freezing outside ok. All I wanted was my bed and duvet. All tugged inside and be isolated. To think of it, I'd probably disregard the fire alarm if I were home coz false alarm was a norm, yaya I know it's not a very good thing to hold up to, but, ok no but.

Back to the scene. Someone contacted this guy who's in charge of the flat, and all was done was had that alarm switched off. Ha. Nope. I'm not being ironic here. I'm just, speechless. At least let us know what's goin on eh. Anyways, not like it's of any importance now for I'm already fully conscious.

Btw, seeing everyone being zombified and acting on autopilot was quite, errr, a something. =p

I'm goin back to sleep now.

The Pinocchio

Strange.

I've always wondered and I'm still wondering why is the annoyance feeling comes so naturally towards a certain person though that certain person is not even pricking your nose?

It is stranger that it's always easier to switch from like to not-like than not-like to like. It takes 5 to not like something, but it certainly needs 10 or more to get that not-like to become like. What is it in our mind that keeps the negative feelings continue to brew while the positive only a languid bliss?

Today, I'm watching the change, of another episode.

p/s: The Pinocchio Play was a lil slow and it almost lulled me to sleep. I think I did for 5 seconds.

The Rose

The Rose

Some say love, it is a river
That drowns the tender reed
Some say love, it is a razor
That leaves your soul to bleed

Some say love, it is a hunger
An endless aching need
I say love, it is a flower
And you, its only seed

It's the heart, afraid of breaking
That never learns to dance
It's the dream, afraid of waking
That never takes the chance

It's the one who won't be taken
Who cannot seem to give
And the soul, afraid of dying
That never learns to live

When the night has been too lonely
And the road has been too long
And you think that love is only
for the lucky and the strong

Just remember in the winter
Far beneath the bitter snow
Lies the seed
That with the sun's love, in the spring

Becomes the rose

Sweet Memories

Sweet Memories - Olivia Ong

Natsukashii itami da wa
Zutto mae ni wasurete ita
Demo anata wo mita toki
Jikan dake atomodori shita no

"Shiawase?" to kikanaide
Uso tsuku no wa jouzu ja nai
Tomodachi nara iru kedo
Anna ni wa moeagarenakute

Ushinatta yume dake ga
Utsukushiku mieru no wa naze kashira
Sugisatta yasashisa mo ima wa
Amai kioku sweet memories

Don't kiss me baby we can never be
So don't add more pain
Please don't hurt me again
I have spent so many nights
Thinking of you longing for your touch
I have once loved you so much

Ano koro wa wakasugite
Itazura ni kizutsukeatta futari
Iroaseta kanashimi mo ima wa
Tooi kioku sweet memories

Ushinatta yume dake ga
Utsukushiku mieru no wa naze kashira
Sugisatta yasashisa mo ima wa
Amai kioku sweet memories

This fills me.

Sometimes When We Touch

Sometimes When We Touch - Olivia Ong

You ask me if I love you
and I choke on my reply
I'd rather hurt you honestly
than mislead you with a lie
And who am I to judge you
in what you say or do
I'm only just beginning
to see the real you

And sometimes when we touch
the honesty's too much
and I have to close my eyes and hide
I want to hold you till I die
till we both break down and cry
I want to hold you till the fear in me subsides

Romance and all it's strategy
leaves me battling with my pride
But through all the insecurity
some tenderness survives
I'm just another writer
still trapped within my truth
A hesitant prize fighter
still trapped within my youth

And sometimes when we touch
the honesty's too much
and I have to close my eyes and hide
I want to hold you till I die
till we both break down and cry
I want to hold you till the fear in me subsides

At times I'd like to break you
and drive you to your knees
At times I'd like to break through
and hold you endlessly
At times I understand you
and I know how hard you try
I watched while love commands you
and I've watched love pass you by
At times I think we're drifters
still searching for a friend
a brother or a sister
but then the passion flares again

And sometimes when we touch
the honesty's too much
and I have to close my eyes and hide
I want to hold ya till I die
till we both break down and cry
I want to hold you till the fear in me subsides

She has a very pristine voice. Stunningly beautiful vocal!!

OK

I dont know how to describe what I'm feeling now. It certainly is not anything along the joyful blissful contented line. It's neither close to the line of misery depressing desolation. It's kinda out of sorts. And that's the problem. Erm. Or maybe not.

I guess I just gotta find a way to tidy up all the thoughts. Too much of them running and tickling my mind and senses make me malfunction, so messed up and tangled now. I wonder how those 'BIG' people take care of their web of mind. I really do wonder. Is the machinery in them more superior? Or I've jus not found the right way.

It's soo energy consuming for me. I know I can handle it, but the process is not always pleasant, like now. It's like I can see the door right in front of me but I just don't know which path to take for there are so many of them all telling me take me take me, den I just want to whine. But then I know I can't coz thats useless. So, that left me at where I am now.

I shall probably have a check list for today.
read the papers
the summary
the appointment
the description
the accommodation
the chemistry
the review

OK. Lets get it started.

I need my bearings back.

Lost and Found

I want to write bout lost and found. About that moment of lost and den found. But the feeling of that moment is now gone. I don't exactly remember how anxious I was when I realised it's disappeared and how relief I was den when it reappeared at my face! That change in the emotion state is quick, like magic, and it just snaps, before you scream in excitement you're already smiling.

Den I realised I'm constantly checkin the pocket if it's still with me, it's not like it's some valuable stuff that money can't buy, but the fact that it has once left me and when I was about to give up after searchin high and low it showed up so unexpectedly that made it 'something' I never want to lose again.

That intrinsic bit of us is so weird.

Solitude

I am passively lying on my bed, savouring the silent night. Media player is playing Sweet Memories, sung half in Japanese and half in English. I don't exactly understand what she's singing, but it touches me a chord. The melody. It compliments so well with this moment. This moment of solitude.

It is again one of those nites, where ecstatic kinda happiness just evades you, while sedation and solitude sink in.

When objectivity moves into subjectivity. All of a sudden, everything begs for elaboration.

One said, silence is golden. It's golden because deep silence is the very base of all words. It has more meaning than words themselves. It is the moment of the unconscious communicating with the conscious. So much so everything is now layed out so clearly in front of me; the passageways, the curbs, the cover, the lights, the flickers, the love, the feelings.

It's still about choice, isn't it?

I'm jus Sleeepy and Sleeepy and Sleepy

Extremely sleepy, I am.

Thought I wouldnt get thru the 2 hours lecture, but thanks to the so lively & interesting Kevin Robert. He sure knows how to keep his audience awake. And I'm starting to look forward to my lil mini project.

Second semester is goin to be a busy term and lets wish I'll see light at the turn of this corner.

He said, intuition is often right than wrong.

And I need to sleep now. Desperately.

It is just like this

Second semester has started jus today. My feelings are all messed up for no obvious reasons.

Or is it because of the Monday blue which I thought I don't and never believe in?

Nite Nite

Falling short on her own standards and not getting what she wants pains her. The train journey always makes her think, for the should and shouldn't, for the what and what nots, for the why and why not.

Tonight, she's craving for some form of comfort.

He remembers what she said to him couple of days ago, that she likes nite nite more than just a good nite. Nite Nite, so he whispers into her ears, ever so softly, touching the most sensitive part of hers.

And that, turns her night all flowers and hearts.

She's much happier now; not because of the word, but rather the fact that he remembers.

I didn't get it

Ever since I read the email I have been feeling a bit dejected, a bit discomfort, a bit ironic, a bit miserable. And I can only accept it. Accept the fact that it's not happening. Accept the fact that I've failed myself. It sucked. It still sucks. So stinkily.

The diversion this evening has helped a lil in pulling me out of that stinkiness. The covers were down covering the entrance, but the side door was opened. We were laughing over our jokes, the past, the sweet memories, the grown-ups-and-downs, tantalizing the bitter sweet taste with occasional sighs. Den, I forgot the side door was still left opened.

And so now, that stench of stink seeped in. I'm not on top of things. I'm not giving my best shot even though I always said I did. That piece of evidence has just spelled it out, dissing me so deliberately at my face. There, right there.

Why do I always have to aim for the best? Why can't I just be happy with second tier? Why am I bothered by it so much? Ya know, the answer to these questions is so obvious; it is because it involves the future, of where I will be in the months to come, my future, and I want that future to be what I want it to be, healthy and happy.

I've not made it any closer to that.

But, I will. Failing once doesn't mean that it's the end. I really hate to have that stinky smell on me.

Awaken by the hunger

So I got up with a hungry stomach. Only all too aware of the darkness in the room. The morning sunlight was not letting through by the deep blueish black blind.

It's funny I was awaken because of that when what I really need is to get an 8 hours sleep to be fit. Not 4. I rest assured you I'll be a zombie later for the day.

And so I got up to be reminded that he1 was talking to she1 so happily while he2 was not exactly talking to she2 for all the churns-out from his mouth was only a word liner. OK, the most three. The beginning of the story is the same. Why is the content so different?

I said, I'd rather have you stopped me. Stop me from goin astray, from getting all the butterfly effects in my stomach. And you did. You did it so bloodly well. There's no more hearts and flowers. Because I'm now lying on my stomach writing this. In its place is a very empty kinda despondency that is only inevitable. Sigh. But....there's always a but, you knew it only too well. And you chosed to keep it in your pocket under the sleeves. I couldn't reach.

There are times that i think maybe it would be for the better; it is and it has to be for the better. But then in those quiet peaceful past-midnight hours of staring at the ceiling wall, and the contour of your body you left on the right side of the bed, I can't bring myself to repeat the thought.

It's always bout the little things, isnt it?

Today is the 17th

I left the hall 30 minutes before the clock striked 12.30pm. My upper arm muscle, biceps? triceps? or what do you called it was a bit numb after writing non-stop for a good 2 and half hours.

I've nothing more to do, nothing more to think. No more biomass, no more gasification, no more crystallization, no more drawing graphs, no more answering questions, no more exams!!! Sitting on my bed, I stared at the ceiling for a while and out the window for a while. Den, I started giggling at myself, kicking underneath the duvet like some lunatic and relished the feeling of having absolutely nothing to do. I'm in an ecstatic state. It's wonderful! No. It's beyond wonderful!

It's raining, but the sky is soo blue.

=)))

Saturation

The alarm clock is making its lulling sound in a repetitive manner. Tsk. Tsk. Tsk. The air is otherwise silent. I turn to my left, the whole stacks of notes and scribbles stare back at me.

I dont really know if I've read enough of them or they've had enough of me because the transmission has stopped. Half an hour ago. Left me feeling so empty. Discarded.

Why are you so elusive? All I want is just a lil bit of you, just a lil bit of that essence. Molecular recognition, is that what it really is?

2 more days.

I want to be in there!

I'm truely amazed by the architecture of Burj Al Arab Hotel, Dubai. When would I have the luxury to be the guest of the hotel? Awwwwwwwww. I need sponsor! =p

Burj Al Arab Hotel, Dubai….the only 7 Star Hotel in the World (Cheapest room - $1000 per night, Royal suit - $28,000 per night)

September is Only Good!

A bit didn't feel like reading my green process. So, I went back to Boon's page to read this which I skipped the last time. According to him, this is always a girl thing, and since I'm a girl, of coz I cannot miss it rite?

THE MONTHLY FLAVORS, WHICH ARE YOU?

I've shuffled the months according to my favourite jus so that I don't have to scroll down the next time. =p

AUGUST: Loves to joke. Attractive. Suave and caring. Brave and fearless. Firm and has leadership qualities. Knows how to console others. Too generous and egoistic. Takes high pride in oneself. Thirsty for praises. Extraordinary spirit. Easily angered. Angry when provoked. Easily jealous. Observant. Careful and cautious. Thinks quickly. Independent thoughts. Loves to lead and to be led (to be led? hmm). Loves to dream. Talented in the arts, music and defense (errr...). Sensitive but not petty. Poor resistance against illnesses (you will sure object this, keke). Learns to relax. Hasty and trusty. Romantic. Loving and caring. Loves to make friends.

Why does it sound soooooooooo much like you? Why? Why? Each of them is enveloped with a story, a story of you...and all the face to face moments, the across-the-table moments, the lying-on-the-bed-phone-to-phone moments, the whispers moment, the really-serious-working-moments, the so-proud-of-you moments, the aeroline moments, the cajole-pleasing moments, the sneaking-out-of-the-house-just-to-see-you moments, the angel moments, the goodnite sleeptight moments, and all those times i looked up at you while lying in your arms and you would be sleeping and i could count your eyelashes and truly see you for who you really are moments...

Sigh. What a pretty digression. It's supposed to be September is a good month, why has it turned into some moments with you?

SEPTEMBER: Suave and compromising. Careful, cautious and organized. Likes to point out people’s mistakes. Likes to criticize. Stubborn. Quiet but able to talk well. Calm and cool. Kind and sympathetic. Concerned and detailed. Loyal but not always honest. Does work well. Very confident. Sensitive. Good memory (but he says I'm a Nemo, a Nemo with short term memory). Clever and knowledgeable. Loves to look for information. Must control oneself when criticizing. Able to motivate oneself. Understanding. Fun to be around. Secretive (and everybody knows my secret). Loves leisure and traveling. Hardly shows emotions (but he says he had enough, T_T). Tends to bottle up feelings. Very choosy, especially in relationships. Systematic.

Very choosy? A bit only wei. He, has seized it.

JANUARY: Stubborn and hard-hearted. Ambitious and serious. Loves to teach and be taught. Always looking at people’s flaws and weaknesses. Likes to criticize. Hardworking and productive. Smart, neat and organized. Sensitive and has deep thoughts. Knows how to make others happy. Quiet unless excited or tensed. Rather reserved. Highly attentive. Resistant to illnesses but prone to colds. Romantic but has difficulties expressing love. Loves children. Loyal. Has great social abilities yet easily jealous. Very stubborn and money cautious.

FEBRUARY: Abstract thoughts. Loves reality and abstract. Intelligent and clever. Changing personality. Attractive. Sexy. Temperamental. Quiet, shy and humble. Honest and loyal. Determined to reach goals. Loves freedom. Rebellious when restricted. Loves aggressiveness. Too sensitive and easily hurt. Gets angry really easily but does not show it. Dislikes unnecessary things. Loves making friends but rarely shows it. Daring and stubborn. Ambitious. Realizes dreams and hopes. Sharp. Loves entertainment and leisure. Romantic on the inside not outside. Superstitious and ludicrous. Spendthrift. Tries to learn to show emotions.

MARCH: Attractive personality. Sexy. Affectionate. Shy and reserved. Secretive. Naturally honest, generous and sympathetic. Loves peace and serenity. Sensitive to others. Loves to serve others. Easily angered. Trustworthy. Appreciative and returns kindness. Observant and assesses others. Revengeful. Loves to dream and fantasize. Loves traveling. Loves attention. Hasty decisions in choosing partners. Loves home decors. Musically talented. Loves special things. Moody.

APRIL: Active and dynamic. Decisive and hasty but tends to regret. Attractive and affectionate to oneself. Strong mentality. Loves attention. Diplomatic. Consoling, friendly and solves people’s problems. Brave and fearless. Adventurous. Loving and caring. Suave and generous. Emotional. Aggressive. Hasty. Good memory. Moving. Motivates oneself and others. Sickness usually of the head and chest. Sexy in a way that only their lover can see.

MAY: Stubborn and hard-hearted. Strong-willed and highly motivated. Sharp thoughts. Easily angered. Attracts others and loves attention. Deep feelings. Beautiful physically and mentally. Firm Standpoint. Needs no motivation. Easily consoled. Systematic (left brain). Loves to dream. Strong clairvoyance. Understanding. Sickness usually in the ear and neck. Good imagination. Good physical. Weak breathing. Loves literature and the arts. Loves traveling. Dislike being at home. Restless. Not having many children. Hardworking. High spirited. Spendthrift.

JUNE: Thinks far with vision. Easily influenced by kindness. Polite and soft-spoken. Having ideas. Sensitive. Active mind. Hesitating, tends to delay. Choosy and always wants the best. Temperamental. Funny and humorous. Loves to joke. Good debating skills. Talkative. Daydreamer. Friendly. Knows how to make friends. Able to show character. Easily hurt. Prone to getting colds. Loves to dress up. Easily bored. Fussy. Seldom shows emotions. Takes time to recover when hurt. Brand conscious. Executive. Stubborn.

JULY: Fun to be with. Secretive. Difficult to fathom and to be understood. Quiet unless excited or tensed. Takes pride in oneself. Has reputation. Easily consoled. Honest. Concerned about people’s feelings. Tactful. Friendly. Approachable. Emotional temperamental and unpredictable. Moody and easily hurt. Witty and sparkly. Not revengeful. Forgiving but never forgets. Dislikes nonsensical and unnecessary things. Guides others physically and mentally. Sensitive and forms impressions carefully. Caring and loving. Treats others equally. Strong sense of sympathy. Wary and sharp. Judges people through observations. Hardworking. No difficulties in studying. Loves to be alone. Always broods about the past and the old friends. Likes to be quiet. Homely person. Waits for friends. Never looks for friends. Not aggressive unless provoked. Prone to having stomach and dieting problems. Loves to be loved. Easily hurt but takes long to recover.

OCTOBER: Loves to chat. Loves those who loves them. Loves to take things at the center. Inner and physical beauty. Lies but doesn’t pretend. Gets angry often. Treats friends importantly. Always making friends. Easily hurt but recovers easily. Daydreamer. Opinionated. Does not care of what others think. Emotional. Decisive. Strong clairvoyance. Loves to travel, the arts and literature. Touchy and easily jealous. Concerned. Loves outdoors. Just and fair. Spendthrift. Easily influenced. Easily loses confidence. Loves children.

NOVEMBER: Has a lot of ideas. Difficult to fathom. Thinks forward. Unique and brilliant. Extraordinary ideas. Sharp thinking. Fine and strong clairvoyance. Can become good doctors. Dynamic in personality. Secretive. Inquisitive. Knows how to dig secrets. Always thinking. Less talkative but amiable. Brave and generous. Patient. Stubborn and hard-hearted. If there is a will, there is a way. Determined. Never give up. Hardly becomes angry unless provoked. Loves to be alone. Thinks differently from others. Sharp-minded. Motivates oneself. Does not appreciate praises. High-spirited. Well-built and tough. Deep love and emotions. Romantic. Uncertain in relationships. Homely. Hardworking. High abilities. Trustworthy. Honest and keeps secrets. Not able to control emotions. Unpredictable.

DECEMBER: Loyal and generous. Sexy. Patriotic. Active in games and interactions. Impatient and hasty. Ambitious. Influential in organizations. Fun to be with. Loves to socialize. Loves praises. Loves attention. Loves to be loved. Honest and trustworthy. Not pretending. Short tempered. Changing personality. Not egotistic. Take high pride in oneself. Hates restrictions. Loves to joke. Good sense of humor. Logical.

Prague, here I go!

Hahaha. I've just bought myself a ticket to Prague!!! Hohoho. No need to wait for 6 more days! Coz I just CAN'T wait for 6 more days!

Actually I can, but the ticket doesn't want to wait with me.

Den now I feel like booking for the musical 'The Adventures of Pinocchio'.

And, I've just wasted my half day not mugging, and it'll turn into a third of a day coz I have to go to Morrison to buy the delicious yogurt and the butter bread and the creamy cheese and the fruits and the juice and den to the chinese groccery to get my yummy instant noodle. Den, I'll have to unpack them and make myself a meal and only thereafter I can start working on the Green Process.

Can I ask for more than 24hours a day?

6 more days!

6 more days and I shall be set free.

6 more days and I will know if I'm wanted.

6 more days and I will get myself a ticket to Prague.

6 more days and I shall throw myself into fairy-tales.

6 more days. Just 6 more days.

Stupid Me!

Stupid. Stupid. Stupid.

Why? Coz I'm so brilliant to leave my key card in my room and locked myself outside and paid 20 pounds to get it opened!

T_T

20 pounds! Can I mourn for the money which has jus gone with the wind?

How could I forget to bring my key card out?!!

How could I be such a genius?!

Grrr.

Sleeepy Me

I'm so sleeepy now, yaaawn, but I know I can't go to bed yet. How could I when I left with only one short nite and one long night to mug? I have to get at least an A eh. Hmm, why am I still writing away now? Ok. I need only another 10 mins. 10 mins later I'll be with my notes. For sure.

But hehehe, there's this lil secret which I wanted to tell you. I've finished watching the remaining 9 episodes of the series last nite till early this morning 7.30am. Blek. People also need some entertainment sometimes especially after one paper, right? right? And now I can fully concentrate on my books knowing the ending instead of keep thinkin about it rite? So, this is justifiable. Okla, actually I dont think I'm goin to tell you. Your reply is only standard. I've done it anyway. Kakaka. Blek.

The Dried Rose

I really shouldn't be doin this now. But, the traditional classic trait of procrastination has decided to take the lead. Instead of mugging, I'm taking pictures of my roses which I have now made it dried.

This was taken on the first day I recieved the roses.

This was taken on the 3rd day of its blossom. It looks just soooo lovely, aint it?

And this was taken on its, err, I've lost count. =p. I think it looks pretty too, in a different way.

A closer shot. The petals are nice to be used for home & living decos. Awww. Imagine bathing yourself in a pool of roses petals.....

I thought I just want the shadow of it. =p Shadow, is one whom will never need to face separation.

One liner

Why is it always the devil wins?

A Lonely September

Plain White T's - A Lonely September

I'm sittin' here all by myself
just tryin' to think of something to do
Tryin' to think of something, anything
just to keep me from thinking of you
But you know it's not working out
'cause you're all that's on my mind
One thought of you is all it takes
to leave the rest of the world behind

Well I didn't mean for this to go as far as it did
And I didn't mean to get so close and share what we did
And I didn't mean to fall in love, but I did
And you didn't mean to love me back/but I know you did

I'm sittin' here tryin' to convince myself
that you're not the one for me
But the more I think, the less I believe it
and the more I want you here with me
You know the holidays are coming up
I don't want to spend them alone
Memories of Christmas time with you
will just kill me if I'm on my own, oh

Well I didn't mean for this to go as far as it did
And I didn't mean to get so close and share what we did
And I didn't mean to fall in love, but I did
And you didn't mean to love me back

I know it's not the smartest thing to do
we just can't seem to get it right
But what I wouldn't give to have one more chance tonight (one more chance tonight)

I'm sittin' here tryin' to entertain myself with this old guitar
But with all my inspiration gone it's not gettin' me very far
I look around my room and everything I see reminds me of you
Oh please, baby won't you take my hand
we've got nothing left to prove

Well I didn't mean for this to go as far as it did
And I didn't mean to get so close and share what we did
And I didn't mean to fall in love, but I did
And you didn't mean to love me back, but I know you did

And I didn't mean to meet you then we were just kids
And I didn't mean to give you chills the way that I kiss
And I didn't mean to fall in love, but I did
And you didn't mean to love me back but I know you did
Don't say you didn't love me back 'cause you know you did
No, you didn't mean to love me back
But you did

So much of I didn't mean too. I think I kinda like the lyrics. The music is, err, OK. =p

No surprise this time please

One module can now be kicked out of my mind. Forever. =p

Ermm. I think I'm kinda happy. At least I didn't do too bad. A pass is for sure. Heh. But do you think I'll be satisfied with jus a pass? Of coz not! So, please let me have at least, at least a B. Please. Please. That should be the worst for me to expect.

I don't want any surprises this time.

p/s: and I'm debating with myself now whether to start on my next subject or watch the series.

That's It

So, that's it. The phone interview, lasted only 45 mins. Pheeeeeeeeeeeeew! Now, I can take a deep breath! A big, deep breath that will blow one off!

It didn't go as well as I hope, but let see. I will know the outcome by next week. Since my confidence level is only 60%, I shall be a lil evil now, hoping all other candidates are not as competent. =p

Please, please, please, let me in.

I'm goin to get a heart attack!

I'm feeling really nervous bout tomorrow's telephone interview. Why must they have it during my exam period?

Its not even happening yet. But the thought of havin to go thru this makes my stomach churns, not to mention my racing heart beat. I just don't like it! Can I be a coward? Where's all my confidence? Please, please show your presence!

Awww. I need to calm down! Me, caaaaaaaalm down!

It's only an interview! OK. It's an interview that I wanted so badly. I need to get in there! Seriously really.

Sex scandal? Malaysian Health Minister?

Haven't been reading news for the past few days and this bit kinda shocked me. A sex video tape of our Health Minister Chua Soi Lek with a young lady who isn't his wife was leaked and distributed.

What's goin on here?
Who's the person behind this?
What's with all this recording biz?

Now that he has resigned from all his posts, what's next?

I'm getting lazy to even read this in detail now that my exam is only 1 day away.

Today is Friday

I thought today's Thursday and that I have 3 more days before hitting the exam floor.

Hiromi told me it's not!

You and the Snow

It's snowing!!!! Finally it's snowing!!! Hohohoho.

This is taken from my window. Can you see the snow? Can? Can?

Though it's only a small patch. But I think I'm contented. But, that doesnt mean that I am not hoping for more snow. =p

I don't know why the snow is making me sooo happy. It just does. And you, you made me even happier this morning. I'm liking this morning very much! Very very much till I almost blurted it out to you how much I was missing you over the past 10 days; till I made an error calling you babyee so naturally but corrected it before hitting the send; till I almost cried in joy in your hugs, you hug which I've longed for so dearly.

Can I tell you you're melting my heart now, again and again?
Can I tell you how I wish you're here with me, feeling the snow falling down on us, embracing the love and joy around us, and tasting the snow on each other's lips? That, is an indulgent.
Can I?

errrr

Cant go back to my slumber-land. And I hear sound seeping through my bed to my ears as I rubbed my cheek against the cover. Its ryhthmic. Dung Dung, Dung Dung Dung, Dung Dung, Dung Dung Dung. It's funny that when I pressed my cheek harder to the cover, the sound's gone for the first few seconds before it appeared again.

I'm extrememly positive this is not some hallucination. Why would it? There's no reason, is there?

I've decided to be good on the first day of 2008. I'll complete my molecular, drugs and people assignment which has been dragged on for ages.

Happy New Year, 2008!!!

So much of joy and laughter! Last nite was simply awesome! Never had I laughed and drank sooo much since like a year ago? Thought I was goin to have a really low key countdown for the year 2008, but heh, you never know. Yea. you never know.

Sorrow can turn into joy, in a blink of an eye too!

The fireworks was a lil disappointing thou, but I thought I could still make a wish. Wink. And it's kinda surprising that not many ppl're out for it. Strange eh. Anyways, it certainly wasnt as strange as having the fireworks started at 5.30 in the evening! I aint no kidding here. Seriously. So in conclusion, I still like sg's fireworks display! minus the crowd. =p

The best part is George and all my coolest friends! Now, I really can't imagine a life without friends, without having anybody to turn to, nobody to laugh with, nobody to make you feel special, nobody to back you up, nobody sincere. That'll be a very scary world to live in, and very sad. very very sad. Loneliness. It only eats you up. My stomach churns jus thinking bout it.

'Lying dice' , directly translated from dai wa sek was sooo fun to play, especially when played during night like this. Not so much becoz of the drinking, mmm, maybe a lil bit but I really do not indulge in it, I don't understand how you can be so contented with that bitter taste of beer, maybe its only the beer here, yea, I remember, it wasn't as bad when I had it with you back then, for you always down it for me. =p I loved the champagne thou, and the orange flavoured vodka jus becoz it tasted like carbonated orange juice. It's more of the fact that you finally get some fresh air and play with your friends after hitting the books and got stucked with all the work and all the mundane stuff.

I was feeling a lil bit heady and a lil bit giddy, and a lil bit high in spirit. It's a very nice feeling. It's even nicer knowing there's a shoulder, a comfortable shoulder you can rest your heavy head and body on and not having the need to balance yourself by yourself. The feeling of having the ability to trust is soo nice. And all the randomness you can have.

This is one of those perfect nights, when you just dont think. It's like those don't spoil-my-moments moment. Only laughters, singing, friendships, and a lot more laughters are allowed. I, completely relish the moment.

I've got a really cool and lovely picture taken, which shall be reserved only for my own viewing. Hehe.

And, girl's lips tastes so much softer than guy's. =p

Happy New Year!

I'm goin back to sleep to get my eyes back in shape after this.