Wednesday, May 28, 2008

Glass that is glowing

You said, happy visiting the glass that is glowing. For a second, I was like, huh?!! then I smiled. I would have called the person lame, but with you, I can only smile and giggle over your stupid kinda cute expression.

That side of you, that kiddy side of you. Sigh.

My exams are finally over! I'm 2/3 to getting the cert. How much patience have I left?

But I'm excited now to see my high school mate in the glass that is glowing tmrw! haha. I've 4 days to bump!

Tuesday, May 27, 2008

It's more than that

There are feathers where my heart is; I can feel them tickling and teasing coyly the utmost sensitive flesh deep inside me. All I want to do is to rub against it, but I couldn't reach. The scratch of my skin doesnt quite cut it.

I'm craving, yearning for something, something intangible. There's this weird tingly sensation running down my spine as though somone has just blown into my ears. The lick from the side of the neck to behind the ears.

I would have surrendered.

I'm like a bird..

I'm like a bird in the cage. Agitative.

I just need to be a lil bit more patient.

And I'll be freed.

Here in my home

Stumbled upon this clip and I thought it's pretty good! I like the tune, it has a touch of home. My home. =)




I can see hope!

Saturday, May 24, 2008

Shut up!

3am in the morning!!!! what is wrong with these people?!! I'm so pissed at their inconsiderations for shouting and cursing and crying and laughing and singing and waking me up in the middle of my sleep! Considering the fact that Im not a light sleeper and yet am sitting up writting this now, you can imagine how awful this noise pollution is! it's intolerable! Shut up shut up shut up! I so have the tendency to compete with them who has a better lung! Arggggggggggggggggggggh! For the first time I wish I have a remote control with a mute function to shut out all the noises!

We don't need to know who's cheating on who so will ya keep it just to yourself in your room?! not on the street please! not on the expense of OUR sleep!

Wednesday, May 21, 2008

omg omg omg

OMG OMG OMG OMG I'm sooooooooo extremely completely overly elated. Excited. and it's not just a lil bit. It's very very very very very a lot and its the jumping off the wall kind! I feel I'm goin to be blown away by my own excitement! hohohohoho.

My dearest dearest friend is goin to be a mum soooooon eh!!!! I dunno why I'm sooo excited, I just am! the moment I read, "... that we are expecting a baby at the end of October...", I was like, wow! OMG! gosh!! and can you believe there's even a sudden rush of bloood pumping to my heart, and I can't control my eyes to greedily scan through the rest of the message! It's that explosive!

And I just loooooooooooove the way she described her morning sickness and all the symptoms and her feelings and her eating habits and basically everything. Every bit of details are soooooooooooooooo cute! so mum-to-be like, so adorable I wish she's right in front of me now so I can give her my big bear hug and touch her tummy and have a mummy baby talking session!

Life of another stage! Story of another, is bout to start.

Tuesday, May 20, 2008

FlipFlop Flippy

I feel soooooooooo 'contained' now. Exams, quick go away! pleeeeeeeeeeeeeease.

and I started playing this game by Hong Leong bank. Its addictive, if you think you can score higher. so, go, go fishing. I need a mouse! a better mouse that gives smooth control! The books are killing me, and now the fishes are killing me too!! Grrr. I'm goin to explode! Why can't they have the exams done in 2 weeks time, why la drag for 3 weeks.

Btw, there're prizes to be won if you're in the top 3 of the week, some psp thing, but thats not really my thing. I jus want to be outta this exam zone!

it doesnt JUST happen

Remember, thing doesnt JUST happen.

Everything happens for a reason. It happens because of choice. that we may or may not have realised in time, so, it doesnt just happen.

Thursday, May 15, 2008

A lil sunshine for the day

I'm in smile now. =)))

And that expression of him. So funny-laaa. Ha, I just like to see how one is tryin to hide his shy-ness and the fact that he's happy for what I said which flatters him. That is soooo, teasable!

But, hey, thanks ok. Just wanted to say thank you again and how you've warmed my day with that Vietnamese silk scarf. I was just kidding and what a surprise you actually went to buy it somemore have to say it's one of those cheap ones. Cheh. Now I can't wait to see it. Why la have to wait till I'm back, cannot just mail it over?!

Spring over here doesnt really feel like spring sometimes but I just see summer today! =)))

Wednesday, May 14, 2008

Friend, it hurts

I'd rather you have your piece of mind lay down on the table in front of me than stabbing me with this now-I-know-what-kinda-person-you-are-shit. It choked me for a while I can't believe thats the best you can come up with. Its not about right and wrong now, its bout getting the message across and not have it misinterpreted during the trasmission. Gone off track? fix it. Fix it in a gentleman way. Stop this name calling and bait thing.

It hurts. It hurts even more when I've trusted you. Friend.

Tuesday, May 13, 2008

Self conflicting

I of all know it best this is how it will be. It comes, gives me a few pinch on the left side of my chest, den it goes. Moments later, it repeats itself. Sometimes I feel I'm just so silly to be bothered by it. It doesnt change. Never will. It only shoveled beneath layer after layer. We give in all at the wrong time.

I yearn, I desire. On the other, I'm wistful, deprived, starved. What was I thinking? There were all those laughs and mornings and nites.

This is so fucking irrelevant.

Ratting you out?!

So I admit it's my bad for telling him what you told me coz of my assumption that this is only something nice to share and of no reason why it can't be told when he's your good friend too.

Fine. if I'm in no position to spread the good news of yours to him. But hey, this has totally nothing to do with trust ok. Why do you have to sound as though I've betrayed your trust. I havent even let out my groaning on the bait and rat thing!

Dang! Why la I feel hurt! Its such a trivial matter.

Monday, May 12, 2008

How many rings would you like?

A friend asked me the other day, how many sets of ring should he prepare for his proposal then engagement and then the wedding itself. That, had seriously caught me thinkin for a while, not exactly bout the ring, but more on how guys actually think and plan for all these. it's cute, and funny at the same time. Hehe. you just love them at times like these.

Anyways, the thing is I never thought that how many rings to prepare can be a question of itself. The initial instinct told me that, aint 2 enough? Till he threw me with the question: don't you think I should get 2 rings for the proposal, 2 for the engagement and 2 for the wedding; or maybe 1 for the proposal, 2 engagement, 2 wedding; or 2 for proposal and engagement, 2 for the wedding. I was intrigued! and was like, wow. that's a lot of rings to get.

I don't know seriously. Do people really get that many rings to get to the marriage stage?

Saturday, May 10, 2008

I see

Is it true that only in the death of lands that we see colours, and in the death of love that we see pearls.

What do I see now.

Spring

It's getting warmer now. just like how spring should be. the tulips in front of the union look so beautiful! reminds me of the old me playing in the sea of tulips with only smiles and no worries 6 years ago. My love for tulips. the blue sky. and the kodak moment.

The blossoming of the spring flowers still makes me smile, I can hear my heart dancing when looking at them. The only difference then and now is that I'm holding back more and more in a way I'm not in control of. But, this is not maglinant.

Some things never change. and never will be overtaken.

Friday, May 9, 2008

My new baju to come

I'm actually quite happy today. Hehe. know why? Coz I've finally bought a baju which I think is nice but stupid mun said it looks more like a pyjamas. Hmph!

Anyway, the point is that, I BOUGHT it the second I saw it without even feeling it and tryin it on and make sure it looks good on me!!! Online purchasing is never very much of my thing, but well, sometimes we must do something we don't normally do rite, and have faith on our impulsive action.

Say, the baju looks nice rite? It's only 29SGD including delivery to my KL home. Hoho. Now I just can't wait for it to get to me and see if my love at first sight is going to turn into a long term relationship. If so, I will broadcast it, don worry.




Wednesday, May 7, 2008

Smile, come to me

I'll make myself to smile more now!

Does chocolate really elevate one's mood? I'm havin this belgium chocolate ice cream but it doesnt seem to do ANYTHING. I'm still not smiling, my heart is not. It fills my stomach thou. Ha. See, now I've to say something stupid to get my smile back. Dang! Does it sound pathetic? Please say no. Or I'll have to kill myself. Hoho.

Self entertaining works. So I think. Tomorrow, tomorrow I'll go watch made of honour and talk to mun and ask him to tell me jokes. He's always been good at it how I'm missing it now.

You know it sucks when you're dying to call someone but you can't coz of the time difference!!

Arggggggggggggggggh!! OK. I'm more energetic now than before. So I shall draw smiley faces and get back to work. =))), =P, =D, :B. Eh, I think this :B looks funny, funny kinda cute, rite rite? I'm goin to start using it now. :B kekeke.

Monday, May 5, 2008

Another realisation

I've just realised something. The feeling of being in between, neither here nor there is kinda suckie. Depressing. When everyone has found their seat, I'm still in the middle of searching for mine.

We always say, extremity does more harm than good. To be moderate perhaps is better. But why do I feel that this not too happy to laugh hysterically, not too sad to tear, not too confident to shout out my good, not too coward to hide what I have feeling is making me so helpless; trapped only in the boring middle ground, too average to stand out in any good or bad way, am I.

Ironically, I found myself having a strong affinity towards wanting to be sucked into this swirl of emoness and feel how the the left over energy throbs through every cell in my body, how receptive I'm to every whispers and words, how inflamed and outstretched my nerves are and then suddenly fallen dead. The intensity of such, is infectious.

Can we be a bit simpler?

Sometimes, I just dont understand why some people need to be so defensive and think that there must be something behind why one is doin a good deed.

Sunday, May 4, 2008

Cycle of life

There, a very beautiful and heartfelt post that brings tears to my eyes.

Grandma's lying on the bed in the hospital, dad said it's about time now. Everyone has prepared for the worst. It's not supposed to be an upsetting thing, right? it's part of a life cycle that everyone has to complete, but why do I feel my cheek is wet now?

I'm moved. That pinch in my heart, is still with me.

Saturday, May 3, 2008

Sometimes

Sometimes, we can't even be honest to our own self.

And den, we become confused.

Friday, May 2, 2008

Last Day of Class

Can I tell you how happy I am now!!!!! muaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahahahaha.

I can't help but to smile at myself when I was walking to uni this afternoon to submit the reports. Yea, that stupid interim report which took away my youth is finally done and handed in! that stupid 10% worth assignment is finally a history! and there're no more classes to attend! no more 9am and 6pm! hohoho! can you believe it, I'm done with the final semester! There're only exams to sit for and research to do for the next three months before I kiss Leeds Uni goodbye!

And now here I am. Lying on my bed writing this. savouring the moment of blissful contentment that is mixed with 1% of bittergourd. Sigh. 8 months have just gone past me like this! it's actually a bit scary. Where are the traces of the past?