The remnants feeling that has been lingering around for 10 months is now gone. So she thinks. No more 2am or 4am. No more feeling sugary or upset with the way he talks, the lil details and concerns he shows, the coldness that freezes her heart, the sighs. It's not the same anymore. The ringing in her heart.
So she writes. To tell herself that there's nothing left in that lil shell now. It's a gradual disappearance, time has taken it away before she knew it. The very last bit of it.
She isn't quite sure if that's how she wants it to be. She liked that lil place she reserved for them, despite the greyness it gave her sometimes. There is anticipation for what is coming next; she is awaiting.
Sunday, March 30, 2008
Saturday, March 29, 2008
Library is Good!
It smells of books. Of old rotten yellow papers. I never liked it before, but now I'm here, with 4 giant physical chemistry on the table to my right, my Fujitsu laptop nicely sitting in front of me, a bottle of spring water only an arm's away, and a snicker bar getting ready, I'm all set for the journey.
Never did I yawn once, I'm impressed with myself how focussed I am in this 3 hours. I'm hungry for information, screening, filtering and reprocessing page after page, I've now the answers to the questions. It's fulfilling. Satisfaction gained for a while.
There are still questions sitting there to be ticked off, and I believe the non-existance answers will unravel itself as long as I continue reading.
Never did I yawn once, I'm impressed with myself how focussed I am in this 3 hours. I'm hungry for information, screening, filtering and reprocessing page after page, I've now the answers to the questions. It's fulfilling. Satisfaction gained for a while.
There are still questions sitting there to be ticked off, and I believe the non-existance answers will unravel itself as long as I continue reading.
I'm just so Pissed!
OK. I am really pissed! I've done nothing but wasted the whole day looking for reagents and clean bottles and syringe and I dint get to find that stupid filters thanks to the very well (not) organised lab!
Seriously I'm very disappointed at how this project is run. I aint askin for spoon feeding, but hey, we're given only 3 months it's impossible to do everything just from scratch! Research needs time, and good research needs more time, we can stretch ourselves, but how on earth are we goin to be productive when the superior knows nothing when asked!
And the god damn clock never stops ticking!
I need to come up with some strategy.
Seriously I'm very disappointed at how this project is run. I aint askin for spoon feeding, but hey, we're given only 3 months it's impossible to do everything just from scratch! Research needs time, and good research needs more time, we can stretch ourselves, but how on earth are we goin to be productive when the superior knows nothing when asked!
And the god damn clock never stops ticking!
I need to come up with some strategy.
Friday, March 28, 2008
The very-well-respected-waiting culture
I seriously cannot hold up to this so called well-respected-waiting-culture here! I'm not extremely frustrated, just frustrated. It's not like I've not told that I'll be goin to the lab to start my experiment and we know very well I can't enter the lab without supervision. I wish I can, but rules to be obeyed and so now I have to stuck here writing this while waiting for the person to come. If at all you're coming in late, at least show some courtesy and inform me earlier so that I dont have to be an idiot, and come all the way to uni to find out ohh, I can't start anything becoz nobody's here! Time is precious everyone knows that! and this is not even the first time!
It's just sooo different from where I came from. Nothing seems organised, it doesn't feel like a lab, everyone is nice and friendly but when it comes to work, everything is in a mess. I'm sorry I have to say this but I really think something need to be done to improve the situation.
And now I appreciate so much the support and guidance I was given while working in B1-07, I never once felt lost and not know what to do.
How do I strive from here?
It's just sooo different from where I came from. Nothing seems organised, it doesn't feel like a lab, everyone is nice and friendly but when it comes to work, everything is in a mess. I'm sorry I have to say this but I really think something need to be done to improve the situation.
And now I appreciate so much the support and guidance I was given while working in B1-07, I never once felt lost and not know what to do.
How do I strive from here?
Thursday, March 27, 2008
Dreams
Talkin bout dreams, all I know is that my dreams have shrunk with time I dont know if it's even right to call them dreams now.
There are so many more things in the front cue screaming for my attention, constantly reminding me of the reality, and all I can do and have done was pushing my dreams further and further from the core. Den, this one girl who talked bout her dream a year ago is now walking her dream. It shruck me a chord, would I have the guts to do the same? I've always dreamt of travelling around the globe, just like her, and falling in love with the passers-by, indulging in every different cultures, sing a local song and dance a local dance.
Some say, talk bout dreams only when you are financially secured, it is the bitter cruel world we are living in, money can buy dreams, but never otherwise. Not common anyway. Some say, just follow the call, we have to start somewhere and lets not let the money issue, career issue or what have you stop you from chasing your dreams. Things will eventually fall into place once you have the first step layed down.
And all these boil down to the very key issue, choice. How does one want his/her life to be?
I'm still searching my soul. What do I really want.
Dreams, exist becoz of choice.
There are so many more things in the front cue screaming for my attention, constantly reminding me of the reality, and all I can do and have done was pushing my dreams further and further from the core. Den, this one girl who talked bout her dream a year ago is now walking her dream. It shruck me a chord, would I have the guts to do the same? I've always dreamt of travelling around the globe, just like her, and falling in love with the passers-by, indulging in every different cultures, sing a local song and dance a local dance.
Some say, talk bout dreams only when you are financially secured, it is the bitter cruel world we are living in, money can buy dreams, but never otherwise. Not common anyway. Some say, just follow the call, we have to start somewhere and lets not let the money issue, career issue or what have you stop you from chasing your dreams. Things will eventually fall into place once you have the first step layed down.
And all these boil down to the very key issue, choice. How does one want his/her life to be?
I'm still searching my soul. What do I really want.
Dreams, exist becoz of choice.
Monday, March 24, 2008
I'm off my toe today!
Something is missing somewhere I donno where I cant pin point it out and I think I m losing focus so dont be suprised if I m slurring my text and I decided to let loose the lace today.
So I did something I thought I ll never do but I did it gave me a 2 seconds high as I typed away its weird I know and weird things always excite people and suddenly I feel sentences without punctuation can be kinda cool sometimes like now I m very sure I m enjoying this nonsense act of mine at this very second I feel like flowing with the stream am I digressing I m losing the point now.
We re talking about surname this afternoon I ve got a very rare surname maybe not anymore but definitely absolutely is rarer than tan or chan or khoo or ong or you know what I mean and I came across another Oh family from Kong Kong yes Oh is my surname don laugh and you cannot call me Oh Oh like how my friend did anyways back to the point I dont know this guy and since I m off my toe today I decided to send this guy a message to tell him he has the same surname as I do and I guess I m now waiting for his reply well not like I care if there is any ok I lied I do want to see if I will be ignored or given nasty reply for my idiotic act like you are such a bimbo and the like or he will be so happy and jump off his feet becoz he now get to know another Oh.
OK I will stop this nonsense now my stomach is calling me.
So I did something I thought I ll never do but I did it gave me a 2 seconds high as I typed away its weird I know and weird things always excite people and suddenly I feel sentences without punctuation can be kinda cool sometimes like now I m very sure I m enjoying this nonsense act of mine at this very second I feel like flowing with the stream am I digressing I m losing the point now.
We re talking about surname this afternoon I ve got a very rare surname maybe not anymore but definitely absolutely is rarer than tan or chan or khoo or ong or you know what I mean and I came across another Oh family from Kong Kong yes Oh is my surname don laugh and you cannot call me Oh Oh like how my friend did anyways back to the point I dont know this guy and since I m off my toe today I decided to send this guy a message to tell him he has the same surname as I do and I guess I m now waiting for his reply well not like I care if there is any ok I lied I do want to see if I will be ignored or given nasty reply for my idiotic act like you are such a bimbo and the like or he will be so happy and jump off his feet becoz he now get to know another Oh.
OK I will stop this nonsense now my stomach is calling me.
Sunday, March 23, 2008
Cesky Krumlov
Cesky Krumlov, a lovely small town which is only 3 hours away from Prague by bus. I fell in love with its serenity and laid-backness right away it's such a perfect weekend getaway from the hustle bustle.
The town is very small, sooo small you can be done with all the sight seeing within couple of hours. I wanted to go up the tower but it's only open for public in April, grrrr. Why!!! Now I just gotta miss the chance to take more nicey pictures.
Thats the view from the bridge. It's breath-taking! I just love the colour of the roof!
Looking at this makes me feel like I'm living in fairy tales. Where is my prince?
One of the courtyard within the castle. The wall is sooo nicely painted and I tell you the interior is even gorgeous. What a shame we couldnt enter and can only look at the picture they displayed.
Its the first day of spring and it had to snow! The day gets bright as early as 5am or maybe earlier, this was taken at 630 in the morning.
The snow was sooo lovely to look at but it made me want to stay indoor more, with a cup of hot tea, open fire, comfy couch, I'll be all pleased.
ps: try Eggenberg. Its a locally brewed beer which made me red not even finishing a pint!
The town is very small, sooo small you can be done with all the sight seeing within couple of hours. I wanted to go up the tower but it's only open for public in April, grrrr. Why!!! Now I just gotta miss the chance to take more nicey pictures.
Thats the view from the bridge. It's breath-taking! I just love the colour of the roof!
Looking at this makes me feel like I'm living in fairy tales. Where is my prince?
One of the courtyard within the castle. The wall is sooo nicely painted and I tell you the interior is even gorgeous. What a shame we couldnt enter and can only look at the picture they displayed.
Its the first day of spring and it had to snow! The day gets bright as early as 5am or maybe earlier, this was taken at 630 in the morning.
The snow was sooo lovely to look at but it made me want to stay indoor more, with a cup of hot tea, open fire, comfy couch, I'll be all pleased. ps: try Eggenberg. Its a locally brewed beer which made me red not even finishing a pint!
Easter holiday
Its been two days now. Two whole days of me in total sedation. And it feels very, empty, inside, somewhere. The orange street looks so dead from the window. And that silence in the room, its way too peaceful I'm so bored the ticking sound of the alarm clock is driving me nuts!
Suddenly I'm craving for some human flesh.
Should I start reading.
Suddenly I'm craving for some human flesh.
Should I start reading.
Our Energy Source In Czech
These are some of the stuff we had in Czech to feed our stomach. I dont miss much of them, cept their dark beer! and the waiters. kekeke.
Langose, some street food that we had in the Easter Market. Its made of flour, deep fried and topped with cheese and ketchup. Simple but very nice!
Dumpling is a must try in Czech coz this is what the locals have. And its nothing like our chinese dumplings, see those white round flat stuff? those are dumplings. A bit plain and so you'll have to eat it with the pork and the very yummy gravy. The pork shoulder was sooooo tender I've never tasted such a good pork cooked in this way! Heavenly! and the pickled cabbage, it goes sooooo well with the whole dish.
Langose, some street food that we had in the Easter Market. Its made of flour, deep fried and topped with cheese and ketchup. Simple but very nice!
Dumpling is a must try in Czech coz this is what the locals have. And its nothing like our chinese dumplings, see those white round flat stuff? those are dumplings. A bit plain and so you'll have to eat it with the pork and the very yummy gravy. The pork shoulder was sooooo tender I've never tasted such a good pork cooked in this way! Heavenly! and the pickled cabbage, it goes sooooo well with the whole dish. I donno why that round white thing is called dumpling, Milan boy told me they just called dumplings. *and I rolled my eyes. Ohh, this is at the Dvur restaurant.
Thats the roast pork. Very very very meaty dish and we're all soo stuffed after that we're craving for vegetables the next day. The Czechs love pork thats what I gathered. but they're realllly beautiful!
Thats their traditional czech style strudel aka the apple strudel. Not too bad but I've tasted a better one. =p
This was horrible. Sorry to say that but it just wasn't goood and now I dont remember the name of the restaurant, something along theresa I think.
Awwwww, I loooove this grilled cheees! It just melts in my mouth. Heavenly!
Onion soup in bread. I like the display of it.
Mixed vegetables and tomatoes salad, we realised we need some greens after being a carnivor for days.
Half chicken cooked on open fire. It's alright but I prefer the pork knee.
I looooooove this pork knee! Very tender and yummy and the moisture level was just right. Perfectly cooked!
Why are all the waiters sooo cute and sooo yummy in Czech?
Thats the roast pork. Very very very meaty dish and we're all soo stuffed after that we're craving for vegetables the next day. The Czechs love pork thats what I gathered. but they're realllly beautiful! 
Thats their traditional czech style strudel aka the apple strudel. Not too bad but I've tasted a better one. =p
This was horrible. Sorry to say that but it just wasn't goood and now I dont remember the name of the restaurant, something along theresa I think. 
Awwwww, I loooove this grilled cheees! It just melts in my mouth. Heavenly!
Onion soup in bread. I like the display of it.
Mixed vegetables and tomatoes salad, we realised we need some greens after being a carnivor for days.
Half chicken cooked on open fire. It's alright but I prefer the pork knee.
I looooooove this pork knee! Very tender and yummy and the moisture level was just right. Perfectly cooked! 
Why are all the waiters sooo cute and sooo yummy in Czech? Where to start?
I've got sooo much to follow up yet sooo lil time. Thanks to all the photos and facebook and blogs that I couldnt lay my fingers off them! Especially after 1 whole week of not updating myself and get updates from others it makes me want to just cut open my skull and down it with all the stuff that I missed!
Having a good holiday always means harder work after that. Like now. And I dont know where to start. How how how. And now I'm planning another trip to Bath and London and Edinburgh and Glasgow, I dont know if I've time to finish my thesis lit review and the crystallisation experiment and the 3 undelicious courseworks which have not even been given a glance at yet.
I also want to watch the other boelyn girl and the tudors. and Swan Lake. and organise a get together.
Kla. I just want to rant I've not enough time to do alll the stuff I want to do. You know, this is soooo weird, I complain more being a student than when I was working full time. Aint student's life supposed to be a lot more enjoyable than working adult's? Hmmm.
Having a good holiday always means harder work after that. Like now. And I dont know where to start. How how how. And now I'm planning another trip to Bath and London and Edinburgh and Glasgow, I dont know if I've time to finish my thesis lit review and the crystallisation experiment and the 3 undelicious courseworks which have not even been given a glance at yet.
I also want to watch the other boelyn girl and the tudors. and Swan Lake. and organise a get together.
Kla. I just want to rant I've not enough time to do alll the stuff I want to do. You know, this is soooo weird, I complain more being a student than when I was working full time. Aint student's life supposed to be a lot more enjoyable than working adult's? Hmmm.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)